Yay! I'm back! I missed this thread..........
And now I'm on blooper block....Darn

The Serpent's Pass.

Sokka: Well here we are, the ferry to Ba Sing Se. All we need to do is get on board and we'll go straight to Ba Sing Se, no interruptions, no dangerous journeys, just smooth sailing.
Tahn (pregnant woman's husband): 'Sup Avatar, wanna go through the dangerous and potentially fatal Serpent's Pass instead of a nice, safe boat ride?
Aang: That sounds fun!
Sokka: Aang! Why?
Aang: Why not?
*walks off*
Sokka: Nothing can make this moment okay!
Suki: 'Sup Sokka?
Sokka: Who are you?
Suki: Duh, I'm Suki!
Sokka: Sorry, doesn't ring any bells..
Suki: From Kyoshi Island?
Sokka: Foaming at the mouth guy?
Suki: I kissed you...
Sokka: Well that narrows it down..
Suki: *sigh* Facepaint girl..
Sokka: Oh yeah! I remember you!
Suki: That's great!
Sokka: (to Aang) Seriously, who is she?
Suki: Can I come with you through the potentially fatal Serpent's Pass?
Sokka: Hmm..You're pretty hot...Meh, why not.
Suki: Yay!
*in the Serpent's Pass*
Aang: (to Ying, the pregnant woman) Y'know, you should seriously consider going on a diet.
Ying: No silly, I'm pregnant.
Aang: Oh, what's that?
Ying: Soon a baby is going to come out.
Aang: I see. Katara?
Katara: What?
Aang: Where do babies come from?
Katara: O_o
*at night*
Suki: Hey Sokka, wanna make out?
Sokka: Can't. I swore I'd never love again after my girlfriend died.
Suki: Ouch, harsh........So wanna make out yet?
Katara: And that, Aang, is where babies come from.
Aang: Wow. Hey Katara?
Katara: What?
Aang: Can we make babies?
Katara: Now let me explain another thing to you, it's called social taboo..
*next day*
Sokka: Oh noez! There's no land! Now how do we get across?
Aang: Don't worry, I'll use my Kung-Fu-Action-Jesus powers to part the seas!
Toph: That's Moses dumass!
Aang: Well I want to part the seas!
Katara: *sigh* Let me do it.
*parts the seas*
Sokka: Hey guys, y'know how we're making biblical references?
Katara: Yeah..
Sokka: Well I just saw a Leviathan!
*sea serpent attacks*
Toph: I know! I'll make a Tower Of Babylon!
*Toph lifts them up on a pillar of earth*
Aang: Okay I think we've gone overboard with the biblical stuff.
Sokka: Agreed.
*Aang and Katara pwn sea serpent*
Aang: Well that was easy.
*end scene*
Sokka: Look! We made it out of the Serpent's Pass!
Ying: Oh noez! I'm giving birth!
Katara: Oh no! Nick will never allow a birth to be aired! Quick, Toph, make a censorship-I mean-earth tent.
*end scene*
*Katara walks out of the earth tent to talk to Aang*
Katara: Aang, come inside and watch.
*they walk inside*
Aang: Oh, so that's how it comes out!
Katara: Aang! Censorship!
Aang: Oh, right, I mean, what a handsome little boy!
Ying: She's a girl.
Aang: That's what i said. At least I hope so.
Ying: Hope! That's a perfect name! Our baby's name was given to her by the Avatar!
Aang: Suuure, we'll go with that..
Suki: So Sokka, wanna make out yet?
Sokka: Meh, why not?
*they kiss*
Suki: Bye! I'm leaving now. Hopefully I won't fight Azula, lose, get captured and put in some kind of Fire Nation prison whilst Azula pretends to be me to get into Ba Sing Se.
Sokka: OK then..
*Suki leaves*
Sokka: Seriously, who was that girl? Oh well, score another one for supreme pimpmasta Sokka!
Toph: Your 'pimping' skills just about match my seeing skills.
Sokka: You're just jealous.
Toph: I'll be quiet now.
*on the ship*
Jet: (Russian accent, remember?) Greetings comrade, I am Jet, I'm going to Ba Sing Se to start a communist revo-I mean...start a new life..sure, we'll go with that..
Zuko: I'm..Lee.. Sure..we'll go with that!
Jet: How would you like to help me start a communist revo-I mean...Steal some food and hand it out in equal portions to everyone?
Zuko: That sounds like fun. My part in the last 2 episodes have been missed out completely, so I mightaswell get some spotlight now.
Iroh: Oy vey, vat about my Order Of the White Lotus meeting? Zat vas missed out!
*end scene*
*Zuko and Jet are stealing food*
Zuko: This is just like in Robin Hood!
Jet: The Disney movie or the terrible overly-political 21st century themed BBC 2008 production?
Zuko: The first one.
Jet: For comrade Len-I mean..The Earth King.. Sure..We'll go with that.
Zuko: Yeah!
Jet: You seem like a nice guy, it would be a terrible shame if you turned out to be from the Fire Nation, then I would have to send my boys-
Smellerbee: -And girl!
Jet: -Yes, and girl- in to kill you.
Zuko: Ehehehe...
End.
Xin Fu: Wait! What about our parts?
Master Yu: Aiyah! One more thing! We must find the sheep talisman, it possesses the power of astral projection!
Xin Fu: On second thought, just forget about us.

I just felt like saying it. Off topicness is the norm of this board.

Okay...I know we've had a lot of parodies in this thread and someone (I forgot who) suggested we be a little more original instead of copy/pasting quotes and changing the names.

...

WHOEVER GUESSES WHERE THIS QUOTE IS FROM, GETS A COOKIE!

(Azula and Katara are visiting the Jasmine Dragon)
Azula: *To Iroh, about Zuko coming down from upstairs* Hey, where'd he come from? What's up there? Is that where you keep the girls? You got yourself a little cat house up there?
Zuko: *teasingly* Wow, I think she got you Uncle Iroh. You better give up now.
Iroh: Do not add to this insanity.
Zuko: An innocent boy like me should not be raised in an atmosphere like this.
Iroh: Zuko!
Zuko: I wanna be good, life's just not letting me.
Iroh: Katara, get her out of here.
Katara: *To Azula* Okay, let's go. *pulls Azula towards the door*
Azula: Why do you need me to leave? What have you got to hide?
Katara: Azula, let's go!

Hiatus reason number...whatever..

Sokka: Umm..I'll play..this card?
Aang: Fool! You activated my trap card!
Katara: I told you it was a trap Sokka!
Sokka: Well..you..activated my trap card! So there! *flips over a card*
Aang: Sokka, that's a monster card.
Sokka: Well you activated it!
Zuko: Hey guys, shouldn't we be invading the Boiling Rock and setting all of the prisoners free?
Aang: Quiet scarface, I've just destroyed his monster and now I can attack his life points directly!
Zuko: Grr...
Sokka: You can't attack my life points, I have a monster on the field!
Aang: That's a magic card.
Sokka: Can't you attack that?
Aang: Um..No..
Toph: Hey guys, is this card any good? *holds up Kuriboh*
Sokka: Umm...sure?
Toph: Then I'll play it!
Aang: This is kind of a 2-player game..
Toph: Fine, I understand when people don't want me!
Aang: ...So your life points are now down to 3300, and mine are 5200.
Sokka: Didn't I use that card on you with the fire in the house?
Aang: I used that on you!
Sokka: Right..

AHHHHHH!!!!!!
BLOOPER BLOCK!!!!
Later;
(The real reason Aang was shunned from the Southern Water Trobe)

Aang:??I'm extremely sorry I set off the trap. I've disgraced you people who've let me stay here, even though I'm not a Southern Water Tribe person. I am wicked and ungrateful, and I deserve to be cast out forever. What you said was true Sokka; I am a mysterious person, bald, and a vegetarian.


Sokka: ....Well....if you put it that way...SHUN THE AIRBENDER!!!!

Not one of my personal bests I would give myself a 7/10

The Drill. (PG13, it's just so darn....phallic...)

Aang: Oh look, a giant Fire Nation drill.
Katara: I suppose we should stop it.
Sokka: Right, Aang, go glowy!
Aang: It's not as easy as-
Sokka: GLOWY! NOW!
Aang: I can only go glowy when someone provokes me!
Sokka: Right, Toph, beat the crap out of him!
Toph: Okay!
Katara: No one's beating the crap out of anyone, we'll just take it down from the inside!
Sokka: Meh, that works too.
*in the drill*
Azula: (Darth Vader Voice) I must say minor character from last season, this drill is impressive.
Qin: Oh thankyou Princess! Thankyou thankyou!
Azula: Now your death shall be quick and painless, rather than slow and painful.
Qin: Oh thankyou! Thankyou!
Ty Lee: (Valley girl) It's gotta, like, be fun being you.
Azula: ....Yeah.
Mai: (goth, emo, basically what she is in the show) I can't wait until season 3 when I become an important character.
*in the ticket gate*
Customs lady: Okay, so you two are the prince of the Fire Nation and the Firelord's brother.
Zuko: Yup.
Iroh: Zat just about sums it up.
Customs lady: .....Whatever, just go through. I don't get paid enough for this.
*they walk on, Jet walks up to the customs lady*
Lady: So you're a Bolshevik hoping to begin a communist revoluton in Ba Sing Se to overthrow the Earth King?
Jet: That just about sums it up.
Lady: ....whatever, just go through. I don't get paid enough for this.
Jet: (to Zuko) Comrade! I have successfully infiltrated Ba Sing Se, soon comrade Long Feng shall overthrow the Earth King and Ba Sing Se shall be the first communist city in the world!
Zuko: O_o
Jet: Did I say that out loud?
Zuko: Yes.
Jet: Can you pretend you didn't hear that?
Zuko: Can you pretend you didn't see my uncle firebending?
Jet: Yes.
Zuko: Then yes, I can pretend I didn't hear that.
Jet: So it looks like we're both trying to bring down Ba Sing Se from the inside!
Zuko: Looks like it.
Jet: I bet I can conquer Ba Sing Se before you can!
Zuko: Oh you are so on!
*under the drill*
Toph: Can I be a main character in this episode?
Sokka: No, just stay under the drill and wait for us.
Toph: *mumbles under her breath*
Sokka: What was that?
Toph: Nothing!
*Aang, Katara and Sokka climb into the drill*
Sokka: According to these conveniently placed plans of the drill, all we need to do is cut through some beams and the drill will collapse!
Katara: Am I the only one who finds the idea of a drill drilling its way through the walls of Ba Sing Se slightly...I don't know...phallic?
Sokka: Katara! This is a kids show!
Katara: Sorry, to the support beams!
*the support beams*
Sokka: Right, here's the plan, you two cut through the drill with water, and I'll stand here and watch.
Aang: How can water cut through solid steel?
Sokka: It can!
Katara: Can't you help us by cutting with your machete?
Sokka: I left it on Appa's saddle when he was taken.
Aang: That's awfully convenient!
Sokka: Just cut through them!
*cutting*
Ty Lee: OMG lyke, it's totally the Avatar! Lyke, OMG!
Sokka: Oh noez! It's prince Zuko's sexually confused sister!
Azula: I'll have you know that in season 3 my heterosexuality is proved when I kiss a boy!
Aang: probably a typo in the script, I'm sure it's meant to say 'kill a boy'.
Azula: That tears it! *firebends at them*
Sokka: I suggest we run.
*they run*
Aang: I'll go to the top of the drill to deliver the final blow, you two distract Azula's emo and valley-girl friends.
Sokka: Won't they kill us?
Aang: Probably, but that's a risk I'm willing to take!
Katara: Wow Aang, you're so brave!
*at the back of the drill*
Sokka: Katara!
Katara: What?
Sokka: What are you doing?
Katara: I'm bending the slurry so that girl can't get to us!
Sokka: Don't do that!
Katara: Why not?
Sokka: She's got huge jugs and she's flirting with me! Sokka wants!
Katara: Didn't you make out with Suki last episode?
Sokka: Who?
Toph: I'll help you Katara!
*toph bends Ty Lee away*
Sokka: NOOOOOO!!!!
*on top of the drill*
Aang: Oh look, falling rocks, that's convenient!
*aang earthbends one into shape*
Aang: Now nothing short of a psychotic sociopathic princess can stop me now!
Azula: Well that's convenient!
Aang: Oh snap!
Azula: I will kill you.
Aang: There's one thing I don't get, why is this drill so phallic?
Azula: I'm proving my heterosexuality!
Aang: Riiiiiiight..
Azula: Shut up and burn!
*kewl magic kung-fu fight*
Azula: Oh noez! I've been defeated!
Aang: It's time for the final blow!
*final blow*
Katara: Sokka, Aang did it!
Sokka: Why? They were so big! They could've been mine! Why?
*train station*
Jet: (to his comrades) I can't wait to get to Ba Sing Se comrades! Communist Revolution here we come!
Zuku: (to Iroh) I can't wait to get to Ba Sing Se uncle! Fire Nation takeover here we come!
*on the wall*
Katara: Nice job Aang.
Aang: Thanks!
Sokka: They were so big! SO BIG!
Toph: Oh get over it!

End.