"How the Evil Sea Star (Almost) Stole Christmas!" (30 minute Christmas episode special.) In a story that rhymes, we are presented with Smarttrick, who hates the idea of Christmas and all who enjoy it. He devises a plan to stop Christmas from coming, but will he be able to pull it off? Episode Notes: The narration of this episode as well as Smarttrick's voice is for this episode only, done by legendary horror movie actor Christopher Lee, in an homage to Boris Karloff. Since this story is told through rhyme, the only way to do this story justice is to tell the whole story through the episode quotes! Episode Quotes:
Bikini Bottom Citizens singing: Fa foo doris da who domis welcome Christmas bring your light, welcome Christmas, on its way. Welcome, welcome, welcome welcome, Christmas Day is in our grasp so long as we have hands to clasp. Trim up the trees with plinkle balls and woofer-woos and wuzzle-was, trim up the weaves with sprinkle snows and deller das. Cause Christmas time is here, so hurry while you can, we've got a lot of work to do to make our Christmas grand! There's lots of peppermint sticks right in the candy store, trim up the boozle bricks then run out and get some more! Trim up the house with glitter galls and sparkle span. Trim up your uncle and your aunt with yards of figgy flan!
Christopher Lee narrating: Every creature down in Bikini Bottom likes Christmas a lot. But a sea star who lived on the outskirts did not. Smarttrick hates Christmas, the whole holiday season! Please don't ask why, no one quite knows the reason. It could be because his pants were too tight, or maybe his head wasn't screwed on just right. But I think the most likely reason of all is that his heart is two sizes too small. But whatever the reason his heart or his pants, he hated the creatures without a second glance. For on Christmas he knew that every little sea girl and sea boy would rush out of bed with the sound of laughter and joy. 'And they will all be happy!' he snarled with a sneer. 'Tomorrow is Christmas! It's practically here!' And on his new sea dog Gax, Smarttricks fingers were nervously drumming. 'I must find a way to keep Christmas from coming! For on tomorrow I know that every sea girl and sea boy will rush down to find toys and then the noise! All the noise, Noise, NOISE! If there's one thing I hate it's all the noise, Noise, NOISE! And there will be wheels rattling from toy railroad car kits, the kind that keep me up at night and give me nervous fits! Drums will be banging, and loud cymbals clanging! And there'll be noisy games like Ka-Zitter-Ka-Zay, a loud noisy combo between lacrosse and croquet. Then all the sea creatures young and old will sit down to a feast. They will eat, they will feast, and they'll feast, Feast, FEAST! They'll feast on sea pudding and rare Sea Roast Beast! Roast Beast is a feast I can't stand in the least! Then, they'll do something I hate most of all! All the sea creatures the tall and the small will stand in the square, with fireworks exploding, Christmas bells ringing, and all the sea creatures, will then start singing! And they'll ring and they'll sing, and they'll sing, Sing, SING!' And the more Smarttrick thought of this Sea Creature Sing, the more the star thought: 'I must stop this whole thing! Why, for 23 days I've put up with it now! I must keep Christmas from coming! But how?' Then he got an idea. An AWFUL idea! The Sea Star got wonderfully horrible AWFUL idea! 'I know just what to do,' Smarttrick chuckled with his throat. 'I'll make a quick Santa hat and a coat! What a neat sea star trick! With this hat and coat, I'll look just like old Nick!'
Aries Spears singing: You're a mean one Mr. Star, you really are a heel. You're as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel Mr. Star! You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel! You're a foul one Mr. Star, your heart's an empty hole. Your brain is full of spiders, you have garlic in your soul Mr. Star! I wouldn't touch you with a 39 and a half foot pole!
Christopher Lee: 'All I need is a sea deer!' Smarttrick looked around but since sea deer were scarce there were none to be found but did that stop him? Smarttrick simply said: 'If I can't find a sea deer, I'll make one instead!' So he got his sea dog and with some black thread, tied a big sea horn on the top of his head. Then he got a red sleigh, filled it with empty sacks, and when Smarttrick was ready, he whistled for Gax. Than Smarttrick and his sea dog began their trip down to where all the sea creatures lay a-snooze in their town. (Commercial Break.) The whole town was dark, no one knew he was there. All the sea creatures were dreaming sweet dreams without care. He pointed in a tree dome, and nested in there was a sweet, fresh pineapple house to be found there. 'We will make this the very first stop' Smarttrick said, and climbed out of the sea sleigh that was red. And then the sea star very quick very nimbly, decided to slide himself down the sea chimney. He slid his way down, a rather tight fit but if Santa could do it, then so could Smarttrick. He got stuck only once for a minute or two, and then he stuck his head out of the chimney place flu. 'These stockings' he snarled, 'are the first things to go!' Then he slithered around the tree with a smile most unpleasant and the sea star very greedily took every present. Video games, pan-tooblers, fan-fooblers and plums, DVD's, drawing books and drums! Then the sea star one by one very nimbly, threw up all the gifts right up the chimney!
Aries Spears: You're a vile one Mr. Star, there are termites in your smile. You have every charming tenderness of a seasick crocodile Mr. Star! Given the choice between the two of you I'd pick the seasick crocodile! You're a rotter Mr. Star, you're the king of sinful thoughts! You're a wicked crooked jockey and you drive a crooked art, Mr. Star! You're a terrible three deckered poison toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce!
Christopher Lee: Then the sea star still crept, he took the whole feast! He took the sea pudding! He took the roast sea beast! He threw all of the food up in a such a great flash, why that sea star even took the last can of sea hash! Then the Sea Star chuckled with glee! 'Now' grinned the Sea Star, 'I'll stuff up the tree!' As the Star pushed, as he started to shove he heard a small sound like the coo of a sea dove! He turned around quick and he saw a Cheeks! Little Stephen H. Cheeks whose age was barely 3 weeks! The sea star was nervous though the sea sponge was shy, and then the young boy asked-
Stephen: Santa Claus why? Why are you taking our Christmas tree, why?
Christopher Lee: But Smarttrick's brain was so sharp and he was so slick that he thought up a lie and he thought it up quick! 'My dear sweet child' the fake Santa Claus lied, 'there's a light on the tree that won't light on one side. So I'm taking it up to my workshop at the North Pole there. I'll fix it up then I'll bring it back here.' And his fib fooled the child as the star got the kid a cup, then Smarttrick very greedily stuffed the tree up! And the last thing the sea star took, that big liar, was the log for the Cheeks' big roaring fire! On their walls he left nothing but some hooks and some wires. And the one speck of food the star left in the house was a sea crumb, that was even too small for a sea mouse! Then he did the same thing to the other sea creatures houses, leaving sea crumbs much too small for the other sea creatures sea mouses!
Aries Spears: You nauseate me, Mr. Star, with a nauseous, sulfur thought! Your brain is full of unwashed socks with moldy purple spots Mr. Star! Your soul is an apalling dump heap, overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of rubbish imaginable mangled up in tangled up knots! Your a bad one Mr. Star, your a nasty wafty skunk! Your lungs are filled with sea slugs and your kidney's are full of gunk, Mr. Star! The three words that best describe you are as follows and I quote: stink, Stank, STUNK!
Christopher Lee : It was an hour before dawn, all the creatures still a-snooze, all the creatures still in night gowns, when the sea star took the sleigh and rode it out of town! 14,000 feet up, up the top of Mount Trumpet where the sea star would take the sleigh full of gifts to the tip-top to dump it! 'Boo-hoo for those fools' Smarttrick would gloat! I'm sorry to say this sleigh will not float! I'm so glad I'm nearly humming, they'll soon find out that no Christmas is coming! They're just waking up, I know just what they'll do. Their mouths will hang open a minute or 2 and the sea creatures will cry boo-hoo. Whoo! That's a noise' grinned the star, 'that I simply MUST hear!' And he paused for a minute, and he did hear a sound. It started in low, then it started to grow. But this sound wasn't sad, why this sound sounded glad. All the sea creatures in Bikini Bottom the young and the small were all singing without ANY presents at ALL! The star hadn't stopped Christmas from coming: it came! Some how or other, it came just the same! And the sea star with his feet standing cold in the snow stood puzzling and puzzling. 'How could it be so? It came without ribbons, it came without tags! It came without packages, boxes, or bags!' He puzzled and thought until his thinker was sore. Then the sea star thought of something he hadn't before. Maybe Christmas he thought, doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas perhaps, means a little bit more. What happened then? In Bikini Bottom they say that Smarttrick's small heart grew 3 sizes that day. And then the true meaning of Christmas seeped through and Smarttrick found the strength of 10 sea stars plust 2! And now that Smarttrick's heart wasn't so tight, he raced down the mountain in the early morning light. Traveling down the sleigh, down the side of Mount Trumpet, he brought back the gifts for every sea creature and pet. He brought back the video games, he brought back the pan-tooblers, fan-fooblers and Plums! He brought back the DVD's, drawing books and drums! He brought everything back, all the food for the feast. And the sea star himself, carved the roast sea beast. Welcome Christmas while it stands heart to heart and hands in hands. Christmas day is in our grasp so long as we have hands to clasp. Christmas day will always be just as long as we have we!/ Enough said, true believers!

The End!
