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Ask Iroh (thread purly made for fun)

  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [121]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498
    watertribe12 wrote:

    Dear Princess Azula,

    I think that guys name was Zuko or something. Talking about names I actually thought that this next thing I am about to tell was pretty werid.

    The deadly spirits actually dont have names.....FREAKY wellI suppose it makes them even harder to track.

    P.S

    I would love to go shopping with you sometime.

    Oh and the deadly spirits learned how to summon the water under the ground we stand on....pretty cool huh?!

    From,

    The dark side of ice.

    DSOI

    Hi there,

    Damn it....I already have my demon eyes to see their faces and psychic abilities to see where they are right now...but if they don't have names I can't write their names in my deathnote book....

    Sheesh,

    Azula

    Edited on 10/24/2007 6:11am
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  • Avatar of watertribe12

    watertribe12

    [122]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/30/07
    • level: 6
    • rank: Small Wonder
    • posts: 491

    Dear Princess Azula,

    Can we be at peace you sound cool. Oh and maybe sometime you can see the deadly spirits in action...its pretty entertaining seeing them kick butt while I relax!

    I tought them to do this really cool thing too. You know that waterbenders can make water/ice float in mid air and control were it goes? Well I took it up a notch and now they can make ice strong enough to stand on float in the air while there standing on it. So they can soar through the air on a board of ice. COOL HUH?!

    Have you ever flown before? If not I suddgest you come on by the northpole and experience it. ITS VERY AWSOME.

    From,

    The dark side of ice.

    DSOI

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  • Avatar of watertribe12

    watertribe12

    [123]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/30/07
    • level: 6
    • rank: Small Wonder
    • posts: 491

    Dear Princess Azula,

    Waterbenders can find a way to fly but how did the firebenders? If I recall correctly when the air nomads were alive they lived in temples high on the mountain ranges and only sky bison could get you there.

    I'm just curious

    From,

    The dark side of ice.

    DSOI

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  • Avatar of WiseLad

    WiseLad

    [124]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/02/07
    • level: 14
    • rank: Autobot
    • posts: 4,435
    Dear Azula

    you are very powerful, I wish you could be my wife, but I am just an intelligent old man from a village who can foresee things, who has 3 brothers who look exactly like me, but wear different hats than me(I wear a graduation cap)

    I got the most perfect plan for you

    first join with your brother, and get rid of your father, who is too narrow minded and stubborn to be the ruler of all the lands

    second, as soon as your brother and you become rulers of the FN and of the Earth Kingdom(as Zuko would become 54th Earth King), offer to them and the water tribe that they would have freedom, and pardoned for rebelling; but the chosen ones(will explain later what I mean) will have administrative powers over all the lands

    than ask the Avatar(I think name is Aang, at least that is what my brother Xu said)and his group to talk to you, and to bring the 52nd king of the earth kingdom to come also

    ask them for peace, and tell them that from now on all nations will be "separate" but at same time "united"

    the King of the north tribe will become ruler of both north and south tribe, and if the swampers wish, of them also, or they can be subject to the earth ruler, who will be the 55th(formerly 52nd) king; Zuko will be the FN Firelord, and some Kid named Leo would be the ruler of the new Airnation(at least until somehow we end up finding hidden airbenders if any are alive)and take over all 4 temples.

    than you go in a private audience with the Avatar, and convince him that the 2 of you can make sure that together you can decide the best things for all the nations, I think with your persuasive talent, you can do it. and the 2 of you can become engaged, and get married 4 years from now, when he is 16.

    than you and Aang become the administrators of the 4 nations, and heads of the United Council, which would have as initial members, Ty Lee, Mai, the swordman whose name is sikko, sokke or something like that, the blind girl whose name is tuph, taff or something like that, the waterbender girl who was real nice to the village of mine, I think name was Kutara or Kataree or something similar, and your uncle Iroh can be your advisor

    if you do this, than you and the Avatar can rule the whole United nations

    but be warned, if you don't listen and follow my advice, they will find a way to defeat you, and you will end with nothing

    respectfully and admiringly yours

    Weng
    brother of Doc, Xu and Bushi
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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [125]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498

    Dear DSOI,

    It's as simple as this; we eat too much Fu Yong Hai and the gas comes, if it does, we are able to launch ourselves in the air by farting fire! Pretty cool huh? Ah well, your buddies might try to kick my ass.Question is whos ass will get the final kick.

    greets Azula

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  • Avatar of DrHauz

    DrHauz

    [126]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/23/07
    • level: 7
    • rank: Talk Show Host
    • posts: 5
    yurichia wrote:

    Dear Iroh,

    I don't want to freak Ellie out with a letter or a poem.How do I make her like me?Help me but keep the tips smooth,I don't want to freak her out.How's finding a plan to get out of prison going?Please join Team Avatar.They need you and Aang needs to learn Firebending from you.Also,please forgive Zuko.I know your upset but he's still family and Zuko will come and aplogize to you once Zuko becomes completely good.Give Zuko a chance.Good luck.

    P.S.Does the stupid guard give you tea?

    Dear yurichia!

    If you are unsure how to start a relationship, I suggest you just have a conversation with her. You will find out what she likes, and what's more important, how she likes you. I hope you will success and please write me soon the result!

    About the prison, that's a nasty place and the tea is awful. First I waited for somebody to save me, but I'm running out of time so I worked out a little bit and prepared for breaking out. I will teach Aang if I get the official request, but far as I know, Avatar Roku asked Jeong Jeong first, so he is in charge. However, I will be a better teacher for him because I know a few about lighting as well, and after that terrible accident in Ba Sing Se, Aang could use it later against Azula... Don't jitter about Zuko, I like him since he was just a little scallywag with a tail of hair. I'm just a little bit upset because he still didn't find himself among the expectations of the others. He must find his way what he likes to walk on with proud and no shame till he become our great leader of the Fire Nation. But that's another story... So I will be with him when he needs me again, believe me!

    Best regards,

    Iroh

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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [127]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498

    WiseLad wrote:
    Dear Azula you are very powerful, I wish you could be my wife, but I am just an intelligent old man from a village who can foresee things, who has 3 brothers who look exactly like me, but wear different hats than me(I wear a graduation cap) I got the most perfect plan for you first join with your brother, and get rid of your father, who is too narrow minded and stubborn to be the ruler of all the lands second, as soon as your brother and you become rulers of the FN and of the Earth Kingdom(as Zuko would become 54th Earth King), offer to them and the water tribe that they would have freedom, and pardoned for rebelling; but the chosen ones(will explain later what I mean) will have administrative powers over all the lands than ask the Avatar(I think name is Aang, at least that is what my brother Xu said)and his group to talk to you, and to bring the 52nd king of the earth kingdom to come also ask them for peace, and tell them that from now on all nations will be "separate" but at same time "united" the King of the north tribe will become ruler of both north and south tribe, and if the swampers wish, of them also, or they can be subject to the earth ruler, who will be the 55th(formerly 52nd) king; Zuko will be the FN Firelord, and some Kid named Leo would be the ruler of the new Airnation(at least until somehow we end up finding hidden airbenders if any are alive)and take over all 4 temples. than you go in a private audience with the Avatar, and convince him that the 2 of you can make sure that together you can decide the best things for all the nations, I think with your persuasive talent, you can do it. and the 2 of you can become engaged, and get married 4 years from now, when he is 16. than you and Aang become the administrators of the 4 nations, and heads of the United Council, which would have as initial members, Ty Lee, Mai, the swordman whose name is sikko, sokke or something like that, the blind girl whose name is tuph, taff or something like that, the waterbender girl who was real nice to the village of mine, I think name was Kutara or Kataree or something similar, and your uncle Iroh can be your advisor if you do this, than you and the Avatar can rule the whole United nations but be warned, if you don't listen and follow my advice, they will find a way to defeat you, and you will end with nothing respectfully and admiringly yours Weng brother of Doc, Xu and Bushi

    Dear Weng or what's your name,

    It's a very nice advice indeed, but I'm glad you're not in politics. See, the true power of ruling a kingdom is being the only one to rule, opress others. I'm not your average type of do gooder you know. I just love opressing people, I don't like to share powers and give anyone of MY kindgdom the freedom.

    I like your advice in letting me overthrow my father, though I already thought of that some time. Once I came out of Ursas womb I knew what my future would be, thank you.

    If you'd like to join me in overthrowing my father, I would love your help, but don't think of standing in my way once I concered this entire world. I would kill Ty Lee, Mai and Sokki and, well everyone I know, because they are a danger to my world domination then...pssst. Don't tell em.

    Now get yourself back to where you are good at; fishing, or maybe some other blaah villager job you're doing.

    Greets,

    Your friendly neighbourhood (read; I'M EVERYWHERE AND I SMELL YOUR FEAR),

    Azula

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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [128]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498

    Dear Uncle Fat...I mean, Dear mr. Iroh sir,

    I am a very powerful woman and I like to hurt people and world domination, but there's one advice I need; the code of...you know, a man and woman, getting together, creating fruits of evil to once follow me inmy steps towards world domination; I don't understand it. I don't know what people could possibly feel for each other when they know they might rather want to take over the world and kill each other. Some aquaintances of mine just seem such experts at it and itpains me how to see even the dumbest dumbdumb who would never have the strength of the world evenwould understand the code. What code is it, if you have it on paper, please give it tome, it's my only blockage to world domination and I will do everything to get it.I'd be grateful if you could help. If you don't, I might kill you,

    all regards,

    Some woman after world domination,

    Edited on 10/24/2007 7:53am
    Edited 2 total times.
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  • Avatar of watertribe12

    watertribe12

    [129]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/30/07
    • level: 6
    • rank: Small Wonder
    • posts: 491

    Dear Princess Azula,

    Can I make peace with you.......we are the most kick butt girls in history. Our awsomness represents our nations :

    Toph Bei Fong-The best earthbender

    Princess Azula-Best Firebender

    ME!-best waterbender (duh!)

    Aang-Well hes the avatar and the only airnomad so I guess he counts.

    But really girls ARE the best benders.....after all avatar Kyoshi was a girl avatar AND lived the longest EVER!

    Azula we should be at peace I'd rather that then a fight.

    Ummm O CRAP!

    Ummm Azula I have nothing against you OR your team but......I kinda accidentaly killed Mai because she tried to throw a dagger at me (it missed).

    Can we still be mates?

    From,

    The dark side of ice.

    DSOI

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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [130]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498

    Dear DSOI,

    Just being friends of being girls is so lamo....flamo. I don't feel anything for joining in with some chickfest, I have better things to do; world domination. I will not let anyone get in my way. I don't mind you girls being girls, but it's as easily as I would never accept a lovenote from someone random boybeneath my status.................................

    I like to work alone thank you.

    greets, Azula

    Edited on 10/24/2007 7:56am
    Edited 2 total times.
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  • Avatar of WiseLad

    WiseLad

    [131]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/02/07
    • level: 14
    • rank: Autobot
    • posts: 4,435
    Dear Zuko

    you are very powerful, and I am just an intelligent old man from a village who can foresee things, who has 3 brothers who look exactly like me, but wear different hats than me(I wear a graduation cap)

    I got the most perfect plan for you

    first get rid of your father and your sister, who are too narrow minded and stubborn to be the ruler of all the lands

    second, as soon as you become rulers of the FN and of the Earth Kingdom(as you would become 54th Earth King), offer to them and the water tribe that they would have freedom, and pardoned for rebelling

    than ask the Avatar(I think name is Aang, at least that is what my brother Xu said)and his group to talk to you, and to bring the 52nd king of the earth kingdom to come also

    ask them for peace, and tell them that from now on all nations will be "separate" but at same time "united"

    the King of the north tribe will become ruler of both north and south tribe, and if the swampers wish, of them also, or they can be subject to the earth ruler, who will be the 55th(formerly 52nd) king; you will be the FN Firelord, and some Kid named Leo would be the ruler of the new Airnation(at least until somehow we end up finding hidden airbenders if any are alive)and take over all 4 temples.

    than you go in a private audience with the Avatar, and convince him that there has to be an United Nations overview of affairs

    than you and Aang become the administrators of the 4 nations, and heads of the United Council, which would have as initial members the 2 of you, the King of the north tribe, Leo, the 55th EK king, Ty Lee, Mai, the swordman whose name is sikko, sokke or something like that, the blind girl whose name is tuph, taff or something like that, the waterbender girl who was real nice to the village of mine, I think name was Kutara or Kataree or something similar, and your uncle Iroh can be the main advisor

    if you do this, than all of you can be sure to keep things neat and in equilibrium between all nations

    respectfully yours

    Weng
    brother of Doc, Xu and Bushi

    PS I just send also a letter to the avatar telling him that all lands should be free but at same time united
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  • Avatar of watertribe12

    watertribe12

    [132]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/30/07
    • level: 6
    • rank: Small Wonder
    • posts: 491

    Dear Princess Azula,

    I know what you mean....I prefer servents then friends....friends get in the way alot. At least if not friends we can be at peace right? Ummm I did kill Mai though.....(is there a place I can hide the body?)

    from,

    The dark side of ice.

    DSOI

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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [133]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498

    Dear Haru,

    I know you are just some random boy, but I'd like to meet you again.....I'd like to meet you again because I think your hair has a smell that might..... help me and inspire me in improving my tactics for reaching to the absolute take over of the world.

    Once you read this letter; destroy it,

    Azula,

    P.S. I won't capture your daddy again.

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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [134]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498

    WiseLad wrote:
    Dear Zuko you are very powerful, and I am just an intelligent old man from a village who can foresee things, who has 3 brothers who look exactly like me, but wear different hats than me(I wear a graduation cap) I got the most perfect plan for you first get rid of your father and your sister, who are too narrow minded and stubborn to be the ruler of all the lands second, as soon as you become rulers of the FN and of the Earth Kingdom(as you would become 54th Earth King), offer to them and the water tribe that they would have freedom, and pardoned for rebelling than ask the Avatar(I think name is Aang, at least that is what my brother Xu said)and his group to talk to you, and to bring the 52nd king of the earth kingdom to come also ask them for peace, and tell them that from now on all nations will be "separate" but at same time "united" the King of the north tribe will become ruler of both north and south tribe, and if the swampers wish, of them also, or they can be subject to the earth ruler, who will be the 55th(formerly 52nd) king; you will be the FN Firelord, and some Kid named Leo would be the ruler of the new Airnation(at least until somehow we end up finding hidden airbenders if any are alive)and take over all 4 temples. than you go in a private audience with the Avatar, and convince him that there has to be an United Nations overview of affairs than you and Aang become the administrators of the 4 nations, and heads of the United Council, which would have as initial members the 2 of you, the King of the north tribe, Leo, the 55th EK king, Ty Lee, Mai, the swordman whose name is sikko, sokke or something like that, the blind girl whose name is tuph, taff or something like that, the waterbender girl who was real nice to the village of mine, I think name was Kutara or Kataree or something similar, and your uncle Iroh can be the main advisor if you do this, than all of you can be sure to keep things neat and in equilibrium between all nations respectfully yours Weng brother of Doc, Xu and Bushi PS I just send also a letter to the avatar telling him that all lands should be free but at same time united

    Dearest Wong...weng,

    I've read all of your words, but they're just words to me, I don't understand because I'm a big dumbdumb. Also I have issues with my hair; I glanced at my girlfriends hair seeing it was all shiny and stuff,so I asked herwhat shampoo she used....unfortunately she didn't want to tell me...I decided to try something called Sexyfine and all of the sudden that braided watertribe girl named Katara came poppin up from the middle of nowhere and I don't want my daddy to hate me I want my daddy to love me and now I gotta go sit in a corner and slice my wrists.

    I will let you know I read your letter though and will tell you this letter hasn't been intercepted by a hawk sent by my dearest and very powerful intelligent, lovely smart and definately the best woman in the world being sister named Azula.

    greets,

    A...Zuko, the big dumbdumb with a humiliating scar on his face

    Edited on 10/24/2007 8:08am
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  • Avatar of DrHauz

    DrHauz

    [135]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/23/07
    • level: 7
    • rank: Talk Show Host
    • posts: 5
    Psyche987 wrote:

    Dear Uncle Fat...I mean, Dear mr. Iroh sir,

    I am a very powerful woman and I like to hurt people and world domination, but there's one advice I need; the code of...you know, a man and woman, getting together, creating fruits of evil to once follow me inmy steps towards world domination; I don't understand it. I don't know what people could possibly feel for each other when they know they might rather want to take over the world and kill each other. Some aquaintances of mine just seem such experts at it and itpains me how to see even the dumbest dumbdumb who would never have the strength of the world evenwould understand the code. What code is it, if you have it on paper, please give it tome, it's my only blockage to world domination and I will do everything to get it.I'd be grateful if you could help. If you don't, I might kill you,

    all regards,

    Some woman after world domination,

    Dear little Azula,

    I know you wrote me but I'm still happy that you did it. You will be amazed how strong I am now, not that fat pig who I was, nor a lean sticky man like my little brother, your father is. From that matter, not easy to tell to a teenager girl the details of the human reproduction, so I keep at the story about 'bees and flowers', but you're cleverer then that... I think you have to wait for the age of 18 and a boy who will kick you ass when you're in 'dictator mode', as I will kick your ass if you shock me again, right? I still have some tricks, for example the high voltage chain lighting... And by the way, you won't get anything for Christmas, I'm still mad about what you did with that pretty doll! Capisci? Good!

    With love, my dear niece,

    Uncle Iroh, the Dragon of the West, the new Pancrator World Champion of the Four Nations

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  • Avatar of WiseLad

    WiseLad

    [136]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/02/07
    • level: 14
    • rank: Autobot
    • posts: 4,435
    Dear Zuko
    my plan went well, I sent 2 letters to you earlier(same message)

    one to be intercepted by your sister, so she would know that you know the perfect plan, which she was not willing to listen to when I gave it to her originally

    the other sent by secret carrier that can't be intercepted, who I was ashamed you hired to get rid of Aang. but between me and Iroh convinced him to be our carrier instead, and I am glad to hear you already got a letter from the Avatar, along with the letter that tells you to find the truth about the demise(spiritual one) of your great-grandfather Sozin when he got rid of Roku

    I am also happy to report that more than half of the FN and most of the rest of the 4 nations will support you, at least that is what king Bumi says in secret letters

    so with all of you together, you can get rid of those stubborn Ozai and Azula

    shame how her father made her into such a monster, iroh tells me she actually was very cute when she was 1 yr old baby, but than Ozai started not allowing her to be much with her mother or with Iroh

    good luck Zuko

    Weng
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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [137]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498

    Dearest General Xan,

    Some time ago some crazy old man with a pair of brothers came up with letters to me that were rather offensive in a way. The man adviced me to overthrow the Firelord, man of my own blood, and create a new order with the other nations, kind of 'sharing' this new order with the Avatar himself and some of his pals. You can imagine how shocked I was to hear this. Recently after I rejected his proposal, which I shouldn't even have, I should ignore a simpleton like him, he decided to send a letter to Zuko in the same style. I thought I intercepted this mail, but I'm afraid, according to Zukos strange behaviour, some second letter came to him. I'm afraid I can't do anything about it, accept for that I read the letter in detail myself and I can try to talk with Zuko about it's content, hoping to find him still on my side.

    Since I know you're stationed near the village where this old man seems to live, according to the origin of the quite polluted looking paper: I ask you to find the man by his name, a Xu, Weng or Wang of Wong or Fu or something like that (which means I forgot his name so I rather want you to destroy the whole village to find him), track him down, capture him and bring him here.

    All my best,

    Azula

    Edited on 10/24/2007 9:50am
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  • Avatar of WiseLad

    WiseLad

    [138]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 09/02/07
    • level: 14
    • rank: Autobot
    • posts: 4,435
    your majesty

    with the utmost respect

    I refuse

    there is no way I would mess with the painted lady that is protecting that village

    she is very powerful, I even think she would defeat you all by herself

    plus since they cleaned the river, I actually enjoying swimming in it, very refreshing

    General Xan
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  • Avatar of Psyche987

    Psyche987

    [139]Oct 24, 2007
    • member since: 10/20/07
    • level: 8
    • rank: Super-Friend
    • posts: 1,498
    General Xan - stop - You will obey - stop - or I'll burn you - stop - with the village - stop -
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