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titlecard

109b - The Krabby Kronicle

At the Krusty Krab, Mr. Krabs finds out that there have been no new customers ever since he put a microscopic Krusty Krab ad in the Bikini Bottom Examiner newspaper, so he goes out and finds out people are buying a different newspaper called the Bottomfeeder behind the Krusty Krab. Mr. Krabs is informed by a buyer that the Examiner is not interesting, whereas the Bottomfeeder is. He also learns that the stories in the Bottomfeeder are not all truthful. When a woman passes by to buy a copy, Mr. Krabs, pretending to be nice, opens the machine for her, only for him to get one for free (he opened it for her, then took one for himself) to find out they charge 25 cents per word. Amazed at the price, Mr. Krabs decides to open his own newspaper business. The next day, SpongeBob finds out that Mr. Krabs will put him on two jobs: his normal fry cook duties, and being lead reporter for the Krabby Kronicle and is then given a badge and a camera.

After finding no interesting stories (despite a bank robbery, two fish destroying someone's boat, and a monster in the background), he walks off only to find Patrick waiting for the bus. Deciding that this banal event would make a juicy story, SpongeBob takes a picture of the scene, but Patrick insists that he was only watching the pole so that the next time it moves, he will be there to see it. At The Krusty Krab, Mr. Krabs tells the lad that his stories aren't juicy enough, and turns the story of Patrick watching a pole into Patrick marrying a pole. Mr. Krabs tells SpongeBob that these are not lies, but to give the people something that they can laugh about.

After this, SpongeBob writes lies about people (which leads to Mrs. Puff losing her job, Larry being kicked out of the gym, The Chum Bucket being shut down, and Sandy's trophies being taken away). SpongeBob tries to tell a now rich Mr. Krabs to stop hurting their friends—as well as their arch-nemesis, Plankton—but Mr. Krabs laughs it off, telling him that he will take away SpongeBob's spatula if he doesn't write more.

That night, Mr. Krabs tells him to give him the wildest story ever, so SpongeBob stays awake all night to write a story. The next day, an angry mob enters the Krusty Krab and yells at Mr. Krabs. It turns out Spongebob wrote about Mr. Krabs torturing him, forcing him to write lies that ruin other people's lives and keeping the money for himself, only caring for the money and didn't care about others. Furious at this, the angry mob comes and takes back all their money. Mr. Krabs, finding out with the printer he can print money, tells the gang to get him some scissors so he can start using his own imagination with the printer. The episode ends with Patrick ordering a Krabby Patty for he and his wife (the pole).

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