048b - Squilliam Returns

On his lunch break, Squidward encounters Squilliam Fancyson with a group of his fans. Squilliam asks Squidward what he has "accomplished" since high school, Squidward, panicking, tells him that he owns a five-star restaurant. Squilliam tells Squidward that he and his friends will come to his restaurant that night, and Squidward is very shocked. He begs Mr. Krabs to let him have control of the Krusty Krab for the day, and when he explains that Squilliam's coming, Mr. Krabs accepts because he knows that Squilliam has money (though this is only faintly implied).

Squidward attempts to train his employees to turn the Krusty Krab into a fancy restaurant, including Patrick, who thought that he was joining the corps and is given the job of collecting the hats. SpongeBob, who doesn't yet know how a waiter workers, is the waiter, and Mr. Krabs, who says he once served on the S.S. Gourmet, is the chef. However, things do not go well; Patrick is beating up the hat rack because it won't "give" him its hat, Mr. Krabs makes terrible food and says that he worked as a janitor on the Gourmet and was the head chef on the S.S. Diarrhea, and SpongeBob can't handle the copy of How To Become A Fancy Waiter in Less Than 20 Minutes that Squidward gave him. Squidward tells SpongeBob to clear his mind of "everything that doesn't have to do with fine dining and breathing". SpongeBob's mind, which is metaphorically portrayed as an office, is operated by smaller SpongeBobs. Their boss's assistant tells them that he's just got an order: Dump everything that isn't about fine dining. They begin to get rid of (most of) all documents, which represent SpongeBob's knowledge, until SpongeBob just stares into empty space and doesn't respond to anything.

Squidward runs outside and bumps into Squilliam, who is just about to enter. They both go inside, and see that the Krusty Krab has been transformed into a very fancy five-star restaurant. After sending all the customers to their tables, SpongeBob tells Squidward that he did all of this, and that he has tied up Patrick and Mr. Krabs in the kitchen. After his meal, Squilliam admits that he is impressed and asks SpongeBob what his name is. However, SpongeBob cannot remember his name, having discarded it along with everything else, and inside his mind, all of the little SpongeBobs are trying to find his name, which ultimately results in his brain snapping in half. SpongeBob goes insane, destroying the fancy restaurant environment and revealing the Krusty Krab for what it really is. Squilliam finds out that Squidward actually is a cashier, humiliating him. However, Squilliam then "admits" that he's also a cashier too before revealing that he was just kidding and that he is "filthy, stinkin' rich!" He and his crowd leave the restaurant to ride in his "balloon/casino," leaving Squidward dejected and defeated once again, but not before Mr. Krabs plays him a sad song in the World's Smallest Violin, which annoys him.